Memory

I have a good memory. Well, scratch that, I have a freakishly good memory. However, with every blessing, comes it’s flaws.

It comes in handy with school, work, reminiscing on pleasant times..and I’ve always been grateful for that.

The times I hate it the most are when reflecting on times of misfortune . With having freakishly good memory, you not only remember everything in full detal, you remember how you felt and can relive that moment over and over and over.

Your heart stops the same, the pain surges from the pit of your stomach and explodes from your eyes as tears..and you’re cursing yourself for even letting yourself go down that way of memory lane.

Over analyzation comes with anxiety. Anything can trigger it, but I’ve been trying to maintain the mental fort without the assistance of government drugs. I’ve been there, tried that, and didn’t feel like myself anymore. So whatever it is that I’m meant to feel, I have.

You know what’s helped me though? Prayer. It’s a powerful thing. And it’s worked better than all the weed, liquor, and government drugs…why? Because the healing comes from within as opposed to the numbing senation from polluting your body hoping for the same effect.

Live and learn folks.